This is the WIP script for the introductory cutscene of Yoshimi Versus Face Punching Robots!
TEXT NARRATION: Like all indie games, our story begins with the zombie apocalypse... October 31st, 1986.
The ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE begins...
Actually, it wasn't a zombie apocalypse, it was more of a localized zombie uprising.
Honestly, more of a well organized, civil prostest in which zombies went door to door petitioning citizens for the redress of zombie grievances and restitution in the form of choco-covered candies.
That doesn't sound right...
Come to think of it, given the date, they might not have been zombies, just trick-or-treaters.
Never-the-less, military reprisal was swift and deadly. They employed a secret weapon; state-of-the art killing machines. Deadly robots.
Unless they really were zombies. Then I guess the robots would be re-killing machines. Un-dead-deadly robots.
All that's not important now.
So little did the military know, the solution to the ZOMBIE CIVIL PROTEST would culminate in ROBOT APOCALYPSE.
The robots went rogue and laid low for years. In 2008 they hacked into the mainframe of a US auto manufacturer and altered production to create inocuous-looking robot parts.
Using their mob ties, the robots infiltrated the waste disposal corporation that would cart-away ton after metric ton of the auto plants' "factory defects" and assemble them at their leisure into a robot army.
Look, can I start over? Because all of that is really ancilliary. Our story really begins with the robot apocalypse...
ROBOT APOCALYPSE. Robots have destroyed most of mankind.
At one point they were harvesting us as a source of electricity, but the power gains were mitigated by the power demands of a computer simulated reality used to subdue humanity and they realized that humans made for fairly poor batteries anyways and being super smart robots dedicated to efficiency, they got right back to slaughtering people.
There is now only one hope for the remainder of humanity; a young scientist and Karateka named Yoshimi.
Our story begins with her...
Sensei: It's dangerous to go alone! But most of humanity is dead now so you'll have to. Anyways, take this.
Yoshimi thrusts a mechanical hand into the air as triumphant music plays.
Yoshimi: Awesome! What is it?
Sensei: It's the ultimate weapon with which to roll back the robopaclypse~
Yoshimi: Don't call it that.
Sensei: ...the Power G.L.U.B.!
Yoshimi: Did you say "Glove" or "Glub?"
Sensei: "Power Glove" was registered years ago. "G.L.U.B." is an acronym for "Glove (that's) Lethal Unto Bots".
Yoshimi: That's awful.
Sensei: Acronyms are hard.
Yoshimi: What about the "Power G.A.U.N.T.L.E.T.?" It could stand for "Glove Armament Used Notably To Leathaly Eliminate... uh, T... where T=Robots!"
Sensei: See? Hard.
Yoshimi: How about the "Power GL.U.U.B.B.B., GLove Utilizing Ultimate Bot-Busting Biomechanics!
Sensei: Um... actually, that's not ABRUPT SEGWAY. REDACTED TRADE SECRETS INVOLVING GAME MECHANICS.
Cue playable tutorial.
© 2011, mikejkelley