|
Dr. Cooldude
Guest
|
 |
« Reply #20 on: July 10, 2013, 02:02:09 PM » |
|
Here's something for the UNIX Shell users: % rm meese-ethics
rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
% ar m God
ar: God does not exist
% "How would you rate Reagan's incompetence?
Unmatched ".
% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].
% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.
% If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.
% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
% sleep with me
bad character
% got a light?
No match.
% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.
% %blow
%blow: No such job.
% \(-
(-: Command not found.
% sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!
$ drink < bottle; opener
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found
$ mkdir matter; cat > matter
matter: cannot create
(First add an /etc/hosts alias of 'elvis')
$ ping elvis
elvis is alive.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #21 on: March 26, 2014, 05:41:02 AM » |
|
That kid is as smart as a WIP.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #22 on: May 01, 2014, 11:57:47 AM » |
|
I use to know an IT guy whom liked to warn his coworkers just after he'd done a "core dump" if they were on their way to the bathroom.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #23 on: May 08, 2014, 10:49:25 AM » |
|
A guy walks out of a bar, picks it up, and says, "That was such a stringy theory."
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
Whiteclaws
|
|
« Reply #24 on: May 08, 2014, 05:38:42 PM » |
|
Why do java devs wear glasses, because they don't C sharp
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
absolute8
|
|
« Reply #25 on: May 23, 2014, 08:59:49 AM » |
|
Why do java devs wear glasses, because they don't C sharp
This joke totally wins with me right now. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Manuel Magalhães
|
|
« Reply #26 on: May 23, 2014, 09:15:37 AM » |
|
A guy buys pies for a party. His circle of friends said that the two pies were pretty rad.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Whiteclaws
|
|
« Reply #27 on: May 23, 2014, 01:44:04 PM » |
|
This joke totally wins with me right now.
Like a boss  |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #28 on: May 30, 2014, 07:15:57 AM » |
|
I do like that C# one, but it's not their fault: it's caffeine overdoses that're to blame.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
Schoq
|
|
« Reply #29 on: May 30, 2014, 07:41:32 AM » |
|
how many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
they can't because they're too busy laughing at bad computer jokes
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
♡ ♥ make games, not money ♥ ♡
|
|
|
|
Whiteclaws
|
|
« Reply #30 on: May 30, 2014, 12:42:28 PM » |
|
how many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
they can't because they're too busy laughing at bad computer jokes
None, that's a hardware problem How many Microsoft engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None, Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness (TM) as the new industry standard. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
The Translocator
|
|
« Reply #31 on: July 14, 2014, 12:21:42 PM » |
|
Knock knock.
*Who's there?*
Bob
*GET OFF MY LAWN!*
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #32 on: September 19, 2014, 09:17:52 AM » |
|
I woke up 8-bit groggy this morning.
While my coffee was brewing, I was borderline hexadecimal.
After 8-byte and dumping down a mug of joe, I decided to no longer standby and to shine like Chrome.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
beetleking22
|
|
« Reply #33 on: September 19, 2014, 09:27:15 AM » |
|
What do you get when you cross a bungee cord and an owl?
-My ass
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
ithamore
|
|
« Reply #34 on: September 20, 2014, 02:14:27 PM » |
|
What do you get when you cross a bungee cord and an owl?
-My ass
Is that your way of trying to describe a more intelligent cuckoo clock? Evolving to "who" or "whom" would be a significant series of flaps forward for bird-kind themed timepieces. |
|
|
|
« Last Edit: September 21, 2014, 01:52:12 PM by ithamore »
|
Logged
|
Please help TimW, a longtime promoter of indie gaming everywhere and an old friend of TIGSource, to write about indie games full-time.
|
|
|
|
andrewjohn1317
|
|
« Reply #35 on: April 09, 2015, 03:07:10 AM » |
|
What do you call a monkey with a bomb strapped to it?
-a baboom
It's so funny   |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
oahda
|
|
« Reply #36 on: April 09, 2015, 04:09:40 AM » |
|
Knock knock.
*Who's there?*
Bob
*GET OFF MY LAWN!*
knock knock — knock knock who? still my favourite joke of all time A guy buys pies for a party. His circle of friends said that the two pies were pretty rad.
ok this one was good too |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Community
