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[TomHunt]

hugs and condolences, man.

glad to read that you're getting out more lately.

"it is not that we have a short space of time, but that we waste much of it" -seneca

[Manuel Magalhães]

My condolences, and hugs. I hope things get better for your side in the future. I think that getting out with your new friends helps to "clean" your head on moments like this, and hopefully your inspiration will return sooner or later.

[wademcgillis]

Hugs and condolences.

I stopped mourning whenever anyone close died a long time ago. Mourning does nothing. Sorry, that's just my opinion...

[Medevenx]

I've never had anyone close to me die.. I can't imagine how it would feel. Makes me feel like dying first just to spare me of the pain that I will feel when it happens to others. But that'd be selfish of me.

[keo]

it's a really difficult thing, but you're getting older so eventually it will happen, and then it does and you're different after.  

mourning can be out of respect, I think about every bit of them.  But eventually the only thing you can do is to resolve to live a better life in their honor and also appreciate those still in your life.

hugs bones

[Bones]

Holy shit. You've got inspiration for a game. That's the positive.

Considering The Walled Garden is about infinity and life from death.
Your some what correct here.

I stopped mourning whenever anyone close died a long time ago. Mourning does nothing. Sorry, that's just my opinion...

Not mourning, just shaken up is all.
I haven't mourned over death since I was eight years old and learned of my own mortality when my mother died.
All other deaths are pretty insignificant when compared to your own mother's.

To put a nice spin on their lives; they have made me who I am today.

My mother supported my creativity, she was a creative her self.
My grandmother introduced me to Mario on the NES among other videogames. (can see how much that effected me)
My uncle is responsible for some of my very crude and dirty humor.
My dad's roommate taught me patience and to be compassionate to others.

Death gives you a deeper insight into life, you realize just how short it really is.

I appreciate the condolences guys.
Things haven't been easy going lately.

[Medevenx]

my 12 year old shi tzu just passed away this early in the day (3 am something)

so this is how it feels. it just came all of a sudden and nobody expected it

[Claw]

Not much I can say really, I've (luckily so far) not had to deal with much death in my life. Hugs to you Medevenx and hugs to you Bones. 

[pixhead]

I have serious issues that I am having trouble pushing away. I dont want to deal with them but I have no idea how to function with them around. Im really scared. Ive started turning to drugs more so than usual to fight my emotions. I used to only smoke weed but when my problems started I tried salvia and it has progressed.

Today I was really depressed, I didnt know what to do, so I drank some cough syrup and swallowed some random pills. I cant believe I did this, and I am really worried that if I dont find a way to battle my problems ill end up down a dark road.

[Kazuyo]

 I'm addicted to some drugs too, ya it's really bad road.  Pix, I'm think that you should spend more time with your friends or family, don't think about that. Don't watch TV and don't browse internet, just meet with people that you like. I think tha would help you ... Really I want to help you
 Hugs bro
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLL4ZrZeN3s&feature=player_embedded one small wombat 4 you :3

[Tanner]

I have serious issues that I am having trouble pushing away. I dont want to deal with them but I have no idea how to function with them around. Im really scared. Ive started turning to drugs more so than usual to fight my emotions. I used to only smoke weed but when my problems started I tried salvia and it has progressed.

Today I was really depressed, I didnt know what to do, so I drank some cough syrup and swallowed some random pills. I cant believe I did this, and I am really worried that if I dont find a way to battle my problems ill end up down a dark road.

Talk to a shrink. Get help now. You can't do it on your own and the longer you wait the worse it will get.

[Kramlack]

@pixhead: I second the idea of seeing a therapist. It's pretty costly (usually around $100 per hourly session), but it's really worth it, so try to look into seeing one. Kazuyo also had a good piece of advice about going out with friends and doing things. If you're in a spot like me where you're not really sure where to begin, have a look around Facebook for various clubs or groups in your area, things that might seem relevant to your interests. More times that not you can turn up with something!

I won't say any bullshit about how 'it will get better', but there are definitely things you can do to take your mind off of what's troubling you. Best of luck working through this, be sure to keep us updated!

[Graham.]

@pixhead

Been there. You have to climb out slowly.

[pixhead]

I popped more pills last night, and I spent this morning trying to commit suicide. I cut open my wrists/arms/legs and had a toaster beside me while I was in the bathtub. My brother and his girlfriend came home so I had to stop.

I called up my best friend to get me and explained everything. He is the only person to know about the pills. I haven't told him about the suicidal tendencies before but now he knows. He told me that I should really try and get help, and he's right; you all were.

I'm going to see if I can find someone to talk to for free because I am currently broke, but I will try to get some help. I'm in a really dark place right now, but maybe, just maybe, I can pull through. Thanks TIG, you guys are awesome and have always been here, I've gotten through a lot of problems by coming to this thread and hopefully ill get through this one too.

[Danrul]

The rest of you are probably gonna get all up in arms about this but whatever.

@pixhead:

As far as I can tell, all you've done is mention you have problems then go through the tropes of suicidal tendencies.  sure you smoked some weed cut your wrists and got ready to drop the toaster into the bathtub, but really mental problems and depressive issues are just exacerbated by you thinking about them.

The more you tell yourself you're depressed and suicidal, the more it seems like its true. 

Don't blow your money on therapists, don't go around thinking you've got some big fucking issues that need sorting out.  Let me say this again;  if you were /really/ genuinely suicidal, and you honestly had nothing left to live for, you'd have been able to do it guilt free by now. 

Suicide attempts are just an easy way to make you feel like you're in control of whatever your problems are.  Even if you're doing something bad, doing something makes you feel more in control.  All you're honestly doing by cutting your wrists up and dropping pills is giving yourself scars you're gonna have to explain away one day and killing brain cells.

Depression and boredom/isolation go hand in hand; fill your time with something.  Get out of the house, see friends for a while.  Arrange some sleepovers.  Go out and have fun.  Hell, I don't know why you'd feel bad about smoking weed; if you're breaking up the monotony you're closer to breaking whatever shitty cyclic backwards thinking you've got going.

In summary:

1) You're lying to yourself if you say you're honestly suicidal; whether you realise it or not your attempts are just going through the motions of suicide so no-one can dismiss you as being an angsty teen (i would say you're an angsty teen).

2) Suicide attempts feel good cuz all of a sudden everyone gives you attention and concern and its a quick and easy way to get a hit of good will.  Everyone's gonna give you advice, wish you luck, tell you how much they want you to stay, etc etc.  Keep it going and then eventually you're gonna realise how stupid you were and how much you've managed to wreck your friendships.

3) Stop eating random pills; when you wake up to yourself you're gonna wish you didn't fuck up your organs.

4) Just seriously, stop puffing up your problems and how you feel and start doing something productive with your life rather than pissing away your teens sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself.