who gave you this? wikileaks?
To tell the truth, Mediafire, of all places. You see, in a fit of blind aversion to research, I decided to download the entire Thompson Twins discography (just to find that one song that goes Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ow). And while looking through the .rar's afterward, I stumbled upon a little script labeled "im9today.pl". At first I was skeptical, but after reading through the source code I was amazed. It was like I had found the Holy Grail; the powerhouse behind a staple of the TIGSource community.
Unfortunately, the script didn't work, as I'm pretty sure it was tooled for an older version of SMF (the script was launching 404s like nobody's business). Also, it sadly required a missing include to what I believe generated the responses, meaning that those zany comments that we all know and love were replaced with "undef". Also also, geeze man, haven't you heard of whitespace? Just because you can
compress most Perl scripts to 4 lines doesn't mean you should!
In the end I pretty much had to recode the whole thing. It's pretty evident, what with all the comments and useless lines. Heck, half of the lines in that script are just cleanup stuff to make debugging easier, and I could probably remove them without problem. And it still pains me that it's nowhere near as functional as your original script.
But what can you do...