Check out
this post entitled "And this is when I stop gaming."
What an angry baby. Is this sort of attitude at all acceptable? Would it be tolerated in any other sort of artform? Christ, how would YOU guys feel if I came in and said that some indie game had ruined video games for me! I'd be ripped to shreds by you guys, and branded a complete idiot.
Here, let me give it a shot!
Ahem.
I was enjoying The Graveyard. Its linearity is a clear testament to horrid lazy design. But I tolerated it because the things they made me do to get to the next part of the game were easy enough. Until now. Some stupid song thing. Tried it a few times. Failed. Quit playing. Not just this game. But all games. It's over. I'm not letting them abuse me like that anymore.
This also ends the AshfordPride series on the Tigsource in which I play AAA games and talk about something good I find in them. I had already started a post about The graveyard. About [INSERT STUPID TERM HERE THAT LEIGH ALEXANDER ONLY WISHED SHE COULD'VE MADE]. But I'm not going to finish it. It don't want to publish anything positive about this game.
Maybe in another 10 years I'll try playing a game again.
Does anyone want a second hand PC?
See, when you put it like THIS, it sounds even stupid coming from some no-name loser on the forum! Why do you guys tolerate Tale of Tales spewing this nonsense?
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Also, holy shit, just look at this.
And I hate that! If I'm clumsy in a game, it's because the designer made it so. It's not my fault.
It took me all of 5 minutes (after the intro cut scenes) to get stuck in Half Life 2 Episode One because of a jump I couldn't make!...
I couldn't beat a simple jumping puzzle in the first five minutes of the game, which may even have been the FIRST puzzle in the game. So I want to skip it! It's hard! It's not even like he wants to remove something difficult, he wants to REMOVE LINEARITY FROM VIDEO GAMES BECAUSE HE IS TERRIBLE AT THEM. I died on the first pit of a platformer, fuck linearity! My ship exploded on the first bullet in a shmup, let me skip everything!
My GOD, this man is the goddamn Antichrist of video games, his very existence a sign of the end of all things good and beautiful in this world. Reading his informal forum posts paints the picture of a very disgusting, pathetic gamer.
To continue playing Assassin's Creed 2. The first thing I noticed was the way the main character walks. He's a young Italian noble man and he walks like a teenage metal fan, or a football player, or something.
His current mission consists of -you guessed it- assassinating some people
ASSASSINS CREED CONTAINS MORE ASSASSINATIONS THAN I WOULD'VE PREVIOUSLY SURMISED. As a Scott Stapp fan, I am very disappointed.
Why can't I explore my relationship with this woman? Why can't I wear something more comfortable, more fitting my age? Why do I need to fight and run all the time?
Why can't I dress up the woman from the Graveyard in a silly hat? Why can't I make my character do I handstand in The Path. As a handstand enthusiast who has seen many people doing many handstands, I am sorely upset that video games lack handstands!
This is the role I was playing. Not the bourgeoise who falls in love, not the silent man who rejects her, not even the strict piano teacher or the disapproving bartender. No, I was made to playing the little boy, sent outside so he wouldn't bother the grown-ups, where I could throw rocks at seagulls without every being able to hit them.
And I realized that virtually all videogames are like this.
DONT CRY FOR ME ARGENTIIIIIIIIIIIINAAAAAAAAAA
This man isn't a martyr. Martyr don't kill themselves. I feel terrible for this pitiful disgusting
thing. He has wrapped himself up in all these ideals and what if's that he has basically ceased to enjoy video games. And not just a genre of video games, or new video games, THE SMALL BITS OF NAGGING DOUBTS OF WHAT COULD BE IN HIS HEAD ARE STOPPING HIM FROM ENJOYING GAMES THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS SHIT. But they should! Every video game should be what I want! And not just a vague idea of what I want, but I have a very specific laundry list of the shit I want to be in my video game!
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From the same thread, different guy.
really noticed this today as I entered "Stalker" into YouTube's search field. Did I get clips from the masterpiece by Tarkovsky? No! I got trailers and clips from a game based on it... It involved gun-wielding zombies, constant gunfires and military helicopters. Have you really no respect for the source material whatsoever?
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. stands for "Scavenger, Trespasser, Adventurer, Loner, Killer, Explorer, Robber" I'm willing to go out on a limb and say that it's an anagram designed to explain what the game is, and only MAYBE a tangential reference to Tarkovsky. It's practically chilling how these people can want to ruin GOOD GAMES, MAYBE EVEN THE BEST GAMES, just so they can sit at the big boy's table.
I'm sorry it couldn't adhere to your pretentious view of what this shit should've been. But hey, I hear if you play STALKER backwards to Tarkovsky's "Dark Side of the Blowout", it totally syncs up!
My GOD, you have no idea how hard it was for me to not just post a reaction image here.
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But thank you, this forum is hilarious. I will shuck some more hilarity out of these idiots when Anarkex is back on.