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[Tom Quinn]

Hey folks,

I'm new to the game development scene, so I've been dipping my toes into whatever water I can find. I've tried 3D modeling, coding, and 2D art, so I figured I'd give music a go, too.

Anxious Tedium

I used FLStudio 7 to lay it out and EDIROL Orchestra for the instrument sounds, which I'll admit aren't fantastic. It's been used on the Gamers With Jobs Conference Call a couple times, but I'd like some criticism and suggestions on what I can do to improve. Thanks for your time!

[increpare]

I quite liked the intro, and how you combined the pentatonic melody on the normal strings with the slightly Mixolydian(=folksy) mode on the pizzicato strings. 

In terms of what I thought might warrant considering from a compositional standpoint, I found the pizzicato string line a little bit monotonous; either introducing some other instruments for flavour (say some woodwind instruments, or maybe some brass if you don't mind that too much.  Or, adding a guitar/lute line might be an option, though their sounds will blend maybe too much with the pizzicato strings.  ) might help bulk it out a  little.  Additional lines would ideally not be playing exactly the same thing as the existing ones: you'd either want to give them melodies of their own, or else have them bulk out the harmony.

Alternatively you could just have the pizzicato strings drop out for certain repetitions and replace them with other instruments (harp, for instance). 

A third possibility would be to bulk out the piece harmonically: either introducing new chord progressions into the solo pizzicato string line, or maybe a modulation(=key-change) at some points, or to bulk out the counterpoint between the two types of strings where they're playing at the same time.  But your decision not to do this could be easily defended on the grounds that one of the most interesting thing about the piece in the first place is how the string line builds its melody (i think) by picking out notes from the pizzicato line and extending them.

(have you tried replacing the pizzicato string sound with a guitar/lute sound?  I have no idea whether that would be a good thing or not to do, but I think it might be worth listening to...).

Anyway, those are my rather fleeting ramblings.  Feel free to ignore them.  But do let me know how work progresses on this piece.

[Problem Machine]

While I agree that the pizzicato line seems a little monotonous, I think that's largely because it's all one note value. If you mixed that up a little, maybe even threw in a triplet or two, I think it'd go a long way towards spicing it up. Also, maybe think of some ways you can build up. If I were to describe the song in terms of intensity over time, on a scale of 1-5, it would look something like
113333333333333311
Whereas something a little more dynamic tends to be more engaging; as an example
114433553311445511

I dunno if that makes any sense at all, but hopefully you'll find it at least worth thinking about as you go forward.

[joshg]

This thread makes me wish I knew more music theory. 

Also, the song is pretty awesome.

[Tom Quinn]

Thanks so much for the feedback, everyone!

Your suggestions are really helpful. You're right, increpare, it would be beneficial to add more instruments. I seem to have trouble putting in new parts that actually mean something, and don't sound thrown in for the hell of it.

Kobel, I totally see where you're coming from. Listening to it again, it really sounds like it needs some "spicing up."

To address a point that nobody's brought up: my main problem right now is the length of the piece. For a song in a game, it seems about the right length to cut together and loop, but nothing bothers me more in a game soundtrack than a short music loop. I think the guitar/lute idea is a good potential solution, but most of what I'll be doing now is trying to extend it.

Oh, and joshg... thanks!   

[Problem Machine]

tom, because repetititition is such a natural and expected part of music, a piece with NO repetition can actually be looped a few times without becoming obnoxious. It's like the difference between a 2 minute piece that's pure composition vs a 6 minute piece that loops 3 times (as most popular compositions do). I doubt many people are going to be hanging around the title menu for more than 6 minutes, so 2 minutes is actually a pretty safe length. That said, the piece will need to be a little more dynamic before that will work, because right now even though you don't really repeat notes all of the notes feel kind of the same.
Basically, what I'm saying is that if you address the issues raised by myself and increpare then I believe that problem will all but solve itself.

[Tom Quinn]

Oh god, I had totally forgotten that the piece was meant for the title screen...

Yeah, okay. I'll see what I can do to make it more interesting.

[increpare]

Your suggestions are really helpful. You're right, increpare, it would be beneficial to add more instruments. I seem to have trouble putting in new parts that actually mean something, and don't sound thrown in for the hell of it.

I know how that feels!  If you find yourself having a lot of difficulty with this, then post all the various things you've tried modifying (possibly w/ audio samples), and I'm sure someone will be able to toss together another batch of suggestions

This thread makes me wish I knew more music theory. 

It had crossed my mind that there might be some small demand for a 'counterpoint lessons' thread. (I had this fantasy yesterday about doing it all over maybe four or five weeks with pxtone, and posting short weekly exercises which other people can complete and post back up).