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Jared C
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« on: February 04, 2009, 04:52:38 PM » |
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Okay, so this thread isn't really about games, but constructive criticism. I'm trying to better my drawings, and thought some of you might be able to help. Here's one I just did:  |
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letsap
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« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2009, 05:21:35 PM » |
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Neat, I like the soft shading, reminds me of something like katamari. Anyway!
The shadow contours are off on the fence post, and it seems to be missing a couple or boards on the side. The fishing planet is pretty good, but try to add some highlights to the ripples on the water, instead of just shadows, so that it gives the impression of rolling hills of water instead of just little dips.
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Inanimate
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« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2009, 05:28:51 PM » |
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I saw this on deviantart! Found it very interesting! Great job, masna.
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Jared C
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« Reply #4 on: February 04, 2009, 07:56:00 PM » |
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Thanks guys! I'll definitely change everything that Letsap mentioned.
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aschearer
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« Reply #5 on: February 04, 2009, 11:49:32 PM » |
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I like it. Now here's your criticism :-)
* Cast shadows are not right, not consistent with the light source
* Fence posts spacing is also not consistent, especially around the edge
* Shading on the green planet itself is great!
* Really like blue planet, mist, etc
* Person's chair not really easy to detect, could make it something other than black or somehow stand out
* Person's fishing line is actually bent the wrong way, its shadow is incorrect, too (or rather, it's shadow is correct and it is not.)
You have a simple style which I really like. I like the palette a lot, and the shading is very well done. How did you create the fog around the blue planet?
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Gr.Viper
Level 1
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« Reply #6 on: February 05, 2009, 12:19:48 AM » |
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House shading can be improved. The shadow looks as if it belongs to a flat arrow pointing upwards. Roof has volume so can't give a perfect triangle at this lighting angle. Person's fishing line is actually bent the wrong way, its shadow is incorrect, too (or rather, it's shadow is correct and it is not.) It can be drawn straight - then it'll be bent downwards relative to the planetary surface. What's that red thing in the background? |
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Now in his mid-forties and still unusual Hubert had learnt many important things, when he was young... ...most importantly, that sanity is a compromise.
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Iamthejuggler
Level 6
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« Reply #7 on: February 05, 2009, 01:15:49 AM » |
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I realise it's a very stylised piece, but the shadow of the house is from a hard light source. However that light source isn't carried over into any of the rest of the picture. The shading on the planet implies a soft scattered light source, which wouldn't cast any hard shadows like that. The shadows on the fence wouldn't even be there if the light source of the house is to be believed. That whole side of the planet would be in shadow. As people have said, the spacing on the fence posts aren't even, but also the angle of them aren't all facing towards the centre of the planet. The red planet looks really quite flat compared to the others. I didn't notice the fishing line curving the wrong way, but manunderground is right.
I like the soft rendering, and the tomes on the house are lovely. I think if you think more carefully about light sources it would hugely improve it though.
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siiseli
Level 6
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« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2009, 02:07:53 PM » |
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I think it's really stylish. Keep up the good work.
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Jared C
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« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2009, 03:42:07 PM » |
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Oh, man, I totally forgot about this thread!  Thanks for the crits everyone. I'll work on a revised version tomorrow.  |
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Hempuli‽
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« Reply #10 on: February 27, 2009, 07:09:52 AM » |
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The title sounds like a cartoon for kids. :D
"Masna goes to School"
"The Happy Day of Masna"
"Masna tries to Draw"
"Masna reaches puberty"
You should try to draw more, and show it off! :D I like that planet.
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Jared C
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« Reply #11 on: February 27, 2009, 12:50:27 PM » |
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Hah hah! :D Yeah, it kind of does. "Masna Procrastinates Drawing More" or "Masna Doesn't Bother Making Corrections to His Current WIP" If I get inspiration for another one, I'll post that. |
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Inanimate
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« Reply #12 on: February 27, 2009, 03:34:08 PM » |
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"Masna Kills a Man"
"Masna Serves Hard Time"
"Masna Learns the Dangers of Unprotected Sex"
"Masna Learns How Babbies Are Made"
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Renton
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« Reply #13 on: February 27, 2009, 03:39:08 PM » |
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"Masna opens a thread which is then filled with unfunny jokes, come on guys, back to the fucking topic"
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Inanimate
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« Reply #14 on: February 27, 2009, 04:01:39 PM » |
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"Masna makes a drawing thread with no drawings in it, making it hard to stay to a now nonexistent topic." But yes, enough of this. Time for some drawings, Masna.  |
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Jared C
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« Reply #15 on: February 27, 2009, 04:10:16 PM » |
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Yeah... I'm working on something right now. Will upload later. EDIT: Just scrapped it. I'll come up with something new later. |
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« Last Edit: February 27, 2009, 04:20:27 PM by Masna »
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policedanceclub
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« Reply #16 on: February 27, 2009, 04:37:06 PM » |
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You could still show it, even if it's bad and unfinished.  |
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Renton
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« Reply #17 on: February 27, 2009, 05:57:47 PM » |
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This is the "tries to draw" thread, mate. Not "makes awesome drawings" thread. You can show us anything. And I'll criticize them to death. I swear it'll only hurt a lot.
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medieval
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« Reply #18 on: February 27, 2009, 06:00:26 PM » |
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you'll only lose a limb or so.
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Jared C
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« Reply #19 on: February 27, 2009, 07:33:54 PM » |
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Some robit concepts.  |
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Developer
